#5. Five Myths About People Who Wait Until Marriage to Have Sex

#5 – All people who wait are preachy hypocrites

The Myth

Lots of young people try to wait until marriage and then give up. There are some personalities that were never really compatible with the whole idea of waiting. When somebody with an incompatible personality tries to force themselves to wait, they often do so using very harsh language in their own minds. They beat and chastise themselves into doing what they have become convinced is proper. And when they are challenged on it, they lash out and lecture others using all the harsh words they use against themselves.

They become the preachy, holier-than-thou types that everybody hates. And then, because their whole decision is based on fear and repression, they cave, over and over again. One minute they’ll be calling some girl a slut, and the next minute they’ll be having sex in the church bathroom, and then two days later they’ll be chastising themselves for it and lashing out at others again.

One day, they hurtfully condemn one of their classmates who happens to be a future Hollywood screenwriter, or the friend of a future screenwriter. And then that writer grows up to make movies and TV shows portraying abstinent people as cruel hypocrites; her revenge against her High School tormentors. The writer’s passionately vicious portrayal sticks in the minds of moviegoers, and helps solidify the stereotype of an abstinent person.

The Reality

There’s a vast difference between people who say they’re waiting till marriage in high school, and those who continue to maintain their decision after they’ve graduated. The latter are the real waiters. And those tend to be very sweet, kindhearted people, not angry preachy types.

As mentioned above, it is often the people who fail miserably at waiting who are the most vocal about it. The successful waiters, the ones who survive high school with their decision intact, who are kind and unpreachy and don’t judge others for their own actions…those people tend to keep their decision to themselves. But we are the silent majority when it comes to waiting till marriage.